Life can suck sometimes, right? We all worry about whether we’ll have enough money to make it through to the end of the month – and whether we’ll ever be able to stop hanging round the “Whoops!” shelf in ASDA.
These 20 tweets from people will make you re-assess your humble existence – proving there are real people out there with real issues. Ladies and gentlemen, Voolas proudly presents Middle Class Problems.
Posh fruit is dangerous. Avoid it.
And they say Avocados are full of health benefits right? Looks like they should be avoided.
When you’re so clever it hurts
What a terrible situation to be in. It must be dreadful to be so clever. And modest.
When you’re too busy to do your middle class hobby
You need to put down your chakras for a bit, love. That might free some of your time up.
Posh fruit part two
We said it before and we’ll say it again – step away from the posh fruit. It’s no good for you. What’s wrong with tinned peaches and evaporated milk?
When you’re having problems with your outdoor pool
We feel for you, Duncan. We accidentally swept ours away last night – admittedly it was a puddle, and it was only a small one. But it was in our backyard, so it kind of counts as a swimming pool…
When your business is so middle class it hurts
Imagine that, being middle class and hating cake. Is there anything worse? HOW CAN ANYONE HATE CAKE?
When your cupboards are spilling over with festive cheer
Just chuck it, love – it’ll only make you put weight on. And no-one really likes Christmas pudding anyway. They only pretend.
Paltrow. Responsible for all the world’s evils.
Not only is she responsible for some of the worst health advice you’ll ever read, now she’s making sure no-one in Crouch End can get their 5 a day.
We feel your pain
But all the same, we think you should get over it and just use proper milk like a normal person.
When you’ve run out of posh plonk, so have to use posh plonk
It all gets boiled away when you cook with it anyway – who cares?
End of days
We stand united with you in this moment of crisis and share your pain. Alternatively, you could just put the grill on and get over yourself.
We’d love it if we had the time to do that. But usually we just about have time to scour the Reduced shelf and get on out to pick the kids up and get on with life.
It’s just a humble request
Don’t we all, dearie?
When you’re so busy being middle class, you forget you’re middle class
What the heck do you want a whole van of agave syrup for? WHAT?
When you want the best of both worlds
We’d like a TV that read our minds and changed channels for us every time David Cameron came on, but it’s not going to happen
He doesn’t mean to complain, but…
You could just have saved time and made one at home?
What an absolute disaster
We’re weeping for you. No, we really are. Not.
When your house is too big to accommodate your head
Move. Get a council house in Salford. Loads nicer.
When your tech is too fancy-schmancy
We’ll look after it for you. We don’t mind. We might wipe *that* U2 album from your music collection though.
When there are no middle class vegetables left
End of days. Get some Bird’s Eye Frozen Peas instead.