If Pluto wasn’t going to make the internet implode this week, it would be the news that a website is selling jewels to cover up your cat’s bum. Yes, that’s right, the world has become so superficial that we have to bling up our cat’s bum.

But that’s not the only crazy product you can buy for your pets online. No, the internet is full of bizarre, and often downright disturbing, accessories for your animals.

Here are 15 of the weirdest products you can buy for your pet:

1. Captain America hamster costume

If your hamster is full of justice then it might just need this costume. Although we wouldn’t fancy trying to make a grumpy hamster put it on. It even comes in sizes for chinchillas and guinea pigs.

Get it here.

2. The Bow Lingual dog translator

We’ve all seen Up, well you know the dog translator? Well someone has gone and made a really disappointing version of it. Apparently this device will tell you how your dog really feels inside… Hmm.

Get it here. 

3.  A DJ cat scratching station

Because inside every cat is a secret desire to be Calvin Harris. More likely, your cat will look at this then walk off unimpressed.

4. Bubble buddy

A bubble machine that pops out dog-friendly bacon flavoured bubbles actually sounds quite cool. The jury is out on whether your dog will be impressed though – especially when it realises there’s no actual bacon.

Get it here. 

5. Dog beer

Yes, you read that right. Bowser Beer is beer for your pooch to drink. Don’t worry there’s no actual alcohol in this beer, but it appears to be really popular with dogs. There is even rumours of some cats who love it too.

Get it here.

6. Poop freeze spray

Yes, you read correctly. This product freezes your pet’s poop making it easier to pick up. Which actually sounds like a genius, if little weird, invention.

Get it here. 

7. Pet nail polish

Oh dear. Now this really is madness. Would you paint your dog’s nails? We doubt the cat would let you…

Get it here. 

8. Pet paint

If you thought painting your dog’s nails was ludicrous then look away now. You can actually buy hairspray to paint your dog with! Just… why? This boxer has been given an American flag design and looks pretty unamused.

Get it here.  

9. Pettattoos

Okay, there’s worse than painting your dog. Temporary tattoos for your dog. We’re pretty positive that if you try to put a “drama queen” tattoo on your labrador they’re going to be pretty annoyed.

Get it here. 

10. A Putin cat scratching post

This is beyond bizarre and beyond expensive at £4,500. Although all the money gets donated to charity.

Get it here. 

11. Doggy thongs

If you’ve ever looked and your dog and thought “my pooch really needs a thong” then fear not as you can buy one! Pants For Dogs have a wide range in doggy underwear in a variety of colours.

Get it here. 

12. Goldfish walker

If you’ve ever thought your goldfish needed some fresh air then you might be interested in this goldfish walker. Sadly it’s not available in the shops, but you could always contact the inventor for a quote.

13. A wig for your cat

If your cat is looking a little boring, why not get it a fancy wig? No, you probably wouldn’t ever buy your cat a wig. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a company dedicated to making kitty wigs. We’re pretty sure a cat would maul you for trying to put this on it.

Get it here.

14. Chicken nappies

If the phrase chicken nappies wasn’t weird enough, these nappies are also patterned. Including a very festive Christmas tree version.

Get it here. 

15. Dog mansions

Not only is this product bizarre, it’s also extortionate at $10,000. These little houses are large enough to accomadate a human, come with wallpaper and even have fancy terra-cotta floors. You can even order a custom house that is a mini-replica of your own home.

There are no words really.

Get it here.